TOP 10

Ways to tell if your
Blackjack Computer Software
is REALLY Accurate

• 10. When you buyin for chips, it does a credit check with
        Johnnie-John's Baha-Panamanian Online Casino.
  

•  9. When you buyin for more chips, it prints out a marker,
        demanding that you sign it and scan it back it.
  
•  8. It auto-links you to www.Bahamas-One-way-Money-Casino.Com.
  
•  7. It comes with an AOL-certificate redeemable for 10 free online hours
        so you can talk with the dealer in Rabbit Jack's Online Casino.
  
•  6. The program recognizes your style of play and BARs you.
  
•  5. You hear "Cocktails?" on the speakers and the CD-Rom opens
        to hold your drink cup.
  
•  4. Your play is so bad that it prints out a comp-slip redeemable for
        a Big-MAC at your local McDonald's.
  
•  3. You hear the sound of Keebler elves giggling while the cards are being shuffled.
  
•  2. When you win over $10,000 it automatically prints you a copy
        of the IRS 6-A Reporting Form.
  
•  1. When you type in "Doug Grant" for the dealer's name,
        it preferential shuffles in every game; including 8-Deck shoes.